Generations of nerds have been told they will inherit the Earth someday, while their tormentors will end up mopping floors and pumping gas. But is there the slightest chance that real life works that way? We plan on getting to the bottom of that, mostly by examining the mediocrity of the world around us. Why do rich guys have such horrible nicknames? What sort of shoes are appropriate to wear on a yacht? Were primitive humans tormented by crafty lizardmen? We ask!